Peg Cheng

Author + Teacher

Peg Cheng

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Making Art Again…After 23 Years

I made art regularly for 18 years from age 5 to 23.

Right before I turned 23, I moved from Southern California to Seattle to start my Master’s in Public Policy at the University of Washington. I also stopped making art.

It’s now 23 years later.

Except for a period of time when I got into rubber stamping with my friend Alisa and made a lot of my own greeting cards, I haven’t made art regularly in more than two decades. That’s a long time.

Finishing my novel draft gave me the freedom to sit back and relax a little. It’s been more than two years since I’ve felt this free to do what I want. It didn’t take long for me to realize what I wanted to do.

I wanted to make art again.

First thing I did was dump out all my art supplies on my bed. It wasn’t a lot–over the years, I’d given away many supplies because I wasn’t using them and wanted them to go to someone who would.

I wanted to create an Art Bag out of an old purse that I could grab anytime and start drawing, whether it was at home, in my garden, or out in the world. I looked through my supplies and picked the essential supplies that I needed.

I was missing a few things so I headed to the Dakota Art Store in my neighborhood. This was the first time I’d stepped foot in the place and it had been open for six years! I was filled with regret that I hadn’t visited earlier, but I put that aside because being in the store filled me with such joy.

Here’s my Art Bag. It contains the following:

  • Canson Mix Media 5.5×8.5 inch spiral-bound sketchbook (cover is decorated with ephemera I’ve collected including a couch sticker from the Lagunitas Brewery, a Chinese red envelope (ang bao), and letterpress art by ilee papergoods)
  • pencil
  • 2 Prismacolor Col-Erase pencils in Copy Not NP Blue and and Rose
  • 3 Faber-Castell Goldfaber Color pencils in Light Yellow Ochre, Burnt Ochre, and Black
  • brass bullet pencil sharpener (keep it in a ziploc bag)
  • 2 Marks A Lot thin-version permanent markers in black
  • kneaded eraser (love this kind of erase so much more than the hard ones)
  • scissors
  • glue stick
  • ruler

This month, as I took a break from writing, I allowed myself to draw whatever I wanted.

I decorated my Hubs’ birthday card envelope (yes, one of my nicknames for him is Snakey because he was born in the Year of the Snake).

I drew a character I’ve created called Fraidy Cat in chalk on a table at our local ice cream shop, Full Tilt. (By the way, if you live in Seattle and can’t eat dairy products (like me), check out Full Tilt. Every day, they have vegan flavors, along with their regular options.)

I sketched an idea I have for a zine called FROGGY, based on a short story I wrote about my stuffed frog (yep, you guessed it, his name is Froggy) years ago. I’m particularly proud of the drawing I made of my brown leather purse in the lower left-hand corner. It was the only thing I drew while looking at an actual object–everything else I drew freehand–and it delighted me that I could still do a decent still life.

I sketched some new clothes I got from my neighborhood used clothing store. Doing this gave me a sense of satisfaction, more so than if I had just hung them in my closet.

Yesterday, I drew a picture of Fraidy Cat, which is the drawing at the top of this essay. I want to make a zine about her–a cat that loves to read and wants desperately to be a writer, but is afraid to write. Drawing her made me happy. It also made me wonder why I stopped doing something that I love to do for so many years.

There are so many reasons why, and I’m not going to get into all of them here–though I think I will explore this in my future zines–but the main reason was, I thought I didn’t have time for it.

For the past 23 years that I’ve lived in Seattle, I’ve had this strong, overriding feeling that I had to work hard and earn a living, and making art just didn’t fit into that equation. Now, I realize that if I had drawn just five minutes a day, it would have made me happier as I continued to work and earn a living.

It’s amazing how long it takes me to learn a greater truth. But I’m also amazed at how quickly I can shift gears once I accept that truth.

I no longer feel right calling myself an author and a speaker. As I redesigned my web site this month, I took a leap and added “Artist” to my title.

It looked right. It felt right. It was like finding the missing piece to a puzzle that I didn’t even realize wasn’t finished.

I’m an author, a speaker, and an artist.

Peg Cheng is the author of The Contenders, a middle-grade novel that asks, can enemies become friends? She is currently writing another novel that is a re-imagining of the Snow White fairy tale set in 1980s Seattle. Peg is also the creator of Fear & Writing, a workshop for procrastinating writers from all walks of life.

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The Best Reward for Finishing My Novel

I sent my SEVEN DUDES DOC AND THE SEVEN manuscript to my editor ten days ago. I dropboxed it to her in the morning, after working on it for 20 minutes (last-minute spellcheck, don’t you know?).

The rest of the day, I was so tired I could barely move. You know that super cute ‘lazy egg’ character by Sanrio called Gudetama? Well, that’s how I felt. Like Gudetama, I just wanted to lie down on my egg white mattress and pull a bacon blanket over myself.

I got into my pajamas early (wasn’t I just wearing these?) and couldn’t do anything except lie around and watch Netflix. I thought I was getting sick again. I had just kicked a terrible, lasting cold a few weeks before but the cough still occasionally came back, so I thought that was it.

Nope.

It was just exhaustion from working on one thing for 26 months.

How did I know it was this and not something else?

Because the next day, I woke up with energy.

I walked down to the farmer’s market with Marcus. Then, for the first time since it opened six years ago, I went to the Dakota Art Store in my neighborhood. I haven’t shopped for art supplies in years…decades! It was like coming home. Then, that night, as if perfectly planned as a reward for finishing my novel (but it wasn’t planned that way at all), Marcus and I went to see the awesome author Anne Lamott speak at Benaroya Hall.

People often think that after achieving a big accomplishment, you should whoop and shout and kick up your heels and celebrate! I often think that. And, I often encourage my friends to do that when they finish something major.

But, that’s not what I like to do.

It’s taken me years to figure this out.

After I achieve something major, I want to sit with that feeling for a while. Quietly. In this case, my body and mind had been slightly tense for so long (26 months!) while working on my novel, that it finally let go and all the energy was drained from me.

For 24 hours.

Then, I got it back.

But I still didn’t want to whoop it up and celebrate.

No, I needed to slowly recover and recuperate after giving birth to my novel.

Walking to the farmer’s market felt good. Shopping for art supplies felt good. Listening to the sensitive, funny, and very human Anne Lamott speak about getting older, mercy, grace, failure, and writing felt good.

I thought that I’d dive right into my next writing project the very next day but that didn’t happen. I wasn’t exhausted anymore, but I didn’t feel excited about writing fiction.

Really, the best reward for finishing my writing was to NOT write.

So, that’s what I’ve been doing the last ten days.

I’ve been drawing, redesigning my web site (how do you like it?), filing my taxes, taking walks, shopping for new clothes, cleaning, decluttering the house, and more.

But, I have not been writing.

And I have to tell you, it sure feels good.

Peg Cheng is the author of The Contenders, a middle-grade novel that asks, can enemies become friends? She is currently writing another novel that is a re-imagining of the Snow White fairy tale set in 1980s Seattle. Peg is also the creator of Fear & Writing, a workshop for procrastinating writers from all walks of life.

Gudetama art square by Kawaii Fabric.

 

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Fear & Writing #2

In Seattle, weather is the bane of every workshop teacher’s existence. When it’s raining, you fear that no one will come out for your workshop. When it’s sunny, you think the same thing. Whether the weather is rainy or sunny, it can end up having the same outcome: no one shows up.

The first time I taught my Fear & Writing workshop was on a rainy Sunday last September. But, to my surprise, a ton of people showed up. In fact, I found out later that my workshop, with 54 attendees, was the highest attended workshop in the Seattle Public Library’s Seattle Writes history.

But, when the sun came out a few weeks ago on March 31, 2018, the day of my second Fear & Writing workshop, I was nervous. It was the first sunny day we’d had in weeks.

Would anyone show up?

Yep.

People showed up.

30 to be exact.

I was so happy…and relieved.

The conference room at the Seattle Central Library felt great, with an encouraging, positive energy. The participants seemed happy to be there.

I loved teaching this workshop again. It felt just as good as when I taught it the first time. Even better in fact, because I was less nervous the second time around.

Several people that came were friends (thanks, Putsata, Thomas, Cynthia, and Melissa). Even my former writing teacher and friend, Brian McDonald, showed up. He had no idea I was going to read from his book, Ink Spots, during the workshop. Even the coordinators of Seattle Writes, librarians Linda Johns and Andrea Gough, took the workshop after introducing me. It was an honor to have all these people there.

Thanks to everyone who came and took the time to listen, learn, freewrite, meditate, and for some, to even read their writing aloud to a room full of strangers. I’m grateful to each and every one of you. Also, I really appreciated the questions that many of you asked at the end of the workshop. Your questions helped me realize what might be missing, and they’ll help me in adjusting the workshop’s content for next time.

In the end, I hope you left my workshop with motivation and inspiration to write more, even if it’s just for ten minutes a day. Remember, you CAN feel the fear and write on!

Peg Cheng is the author of The Contenders, a middle-grade novel that asks, can enemies become friends? She is currently writing another novel that is a re-imagining of the Snow White fairy tale set in 1980s Seattle. Peg is also the creator of Fear & Writing, a workshop for procrastinating writers from all walks of life.

Photos by Marcus Donner.

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My Time at BlogHer18

I was nervous about going to BlogHer18 in New York City.

It was the first conference that I was attending by myself.

In the past, I’ve attended work-related conferences with coworkers or supervisors, and for writing conferences, I’ve attended with at least one writing friend, usually two or three. But this conference was something I was choosing to attend on my own. For someone who treads the line between extrovert and introvert, this was a big step for me. But five months ago, when I heard that BlogHer18 was going to be focused on Health & Wellness, something compelled me to say, YES.

So, I went.

Here are my Top 5 highlights (and just one complaint) from BlogHer18.

HIGHLIGHT #1: BlogHer18 was affordable.

When I signed up in September 2017, BlogHer was running a 50% off special. The registration was only $99 instead of $199. The conference was only a day and an evening, but still, $99 is a steal. First, I checked airline ticket prices to see if I could get a good deal from Seattle to NYC in January. Yes, I could. Second, I called my hubs Marcus to see if he wanted to go to NYC with me in the dead of winter, and he said, yes. I registered for the conference that day. Then, as if the low registration fee wasn’t enough, when I checked in at the conference, they gave me a tote bag filled to the max with samples from their sponsors. I’d never received swag like this before at any conference. (The tote is not shown in this photo but it’s a sturdy one made of natural canvas.)

HIGHLIGHT #2: Location, Location, Location.

I already mentioned that the conference was in NYC, but did I mention that I LOVE NYC? I love it so much that Marcus and I went there for our honeymoon nine years ago. No sandy beaches and tropical drinks for these newlyweds. No, the day after we got married, we flew to Manhattan for 10 days of exploring, noshing on bagels and pastrami, watching Broadway shows, strolling through Central Park, riding the subway, and going to museums. So, when I saw I could attend the conference for just $99 and it was in one of my favorite cities in the world, I had to go.

HIGHLIGHT #3: Speakers were AMAZING.

Okay, truth be told, I signed up without knowing who ANY of the speakers were going to be. There was no schedule when I signed up during the 50% OFF deal back in September. But, after looking at past BlogHer conferences, I saw that they were great at securing well-known, influential, and interesting speakers. So, I just hoped that this conference would be just as good as past conferences. And, it was.

There were so many great speakers, from Julianne Hough sharing her struggle with being diagnosed with endometriosis, to Amy Ziering talking about filming documentaries about sexual assault (check out The Hunting Ground, The Invisible War), to the many influencers and entrepreneurs who spoke candidly about their health issues, how they healed (and/or are continuing to heal), and how they’re helping others. All these women blew me away with their courage, honesty, and tenacity!

But, of the many amazing speakers, there were three that especially stuck in my mind…and in my heart.The first one was Jillian Michaels. All I knew about Jillian was that she was a bazillionaire fitness guru and personal trainer. Because I don’t watch network TV, I didn’t know that she had also been one of the trainers on the TV show, The Biggest Loser, for ten years. But, none of that mattered to me because once Jillian started talking (she’s the one on the left in the photo above), I realized she was one of the most authentic, down-to-earth, truthful, and hilarious speakers I’d ever seen. The way she answered an audience member’s question about how to convince her husband to focus on his health and lose weight was so wise and compassionate that I want to remember it forever. As I listened to her, I thought, I want to be as real and honest as she is. If you ever get a chance to see Jillian interviewed at a conference, do it. You won’t regret it.

Later, my whole table had tears in their eyes after listening to Ruthie Lindsey. Some of us even said that the conference was worth coming to, just to hear her story. I felt that way. You can read/watch Ruthie’s story here. Have some tissues handy when you do. Just like Jillian Michaels, if you ever get a chance to see Ruthie speak, do yourself a favor and go. She will blow you away with her warmth, vulnerability, resilience, joyfulness, and humanity.

Last but not least, one of the main reasons I was looking forward to the conference was to see Arianna Huffington (that’s her on the left with BlogHer President Samantha Skey). Arianna was announced as one of the keynotes after I registered. I read Huffington Post articles all the time and I’ve always been curious about her. She did not disappoint. Listening to Arianna was like listening to the super-wise-no-BS aunt that every woman wishes she had. I tweeted Samantha afterwards, saying that I’d attend a conference where she interviews Arianna for like five hours. I would. And I don’t think I’m the only one.

HIGHLIGHT #4: I realized that I’m not alone.

My key takeway from the BlogHer conference is that I’m not alone. I currently live with several autoimmune disorders. They’re invisible to the naked eye and to everyone I’ve met, I look perfectly healthy. But the thing is, I’m not. Every day, it takes dedicated time, hope, faith, and tenacity to do the things that help me to heal. It’s a long, winding road and sometimes, I feel like giving up, to stop trying. But, something inside me told me to go to this conference and I’m so glad I listened. The speakers at BlogHer18 were what I needed to see, hear, and experience in order to keep going with my health and wellness journey.

HIGHLIGHT #5: Attendees were inspiring.

I met so many cool women at the conference. I wasn’t expecting that. I was just hoping to get good information and inspiration from the speakers. I didn’t realize I’d be just as inspired from my fellow attendees.

I want to give a shout-out to the first people I met at the conference, Jasmin Sanchez and Caitlin Revuelta of Humanscale, a company that makes ergonomic furniture and other products for creating a healthier workplace. I’ve been looking for the right desk chair for decades. I hope that I’ll be able to find one at Humanscale.

Jasmin and Caitlin had the cutest business card holders. They included these fun papers embedded with basil, parsley, and chive seeds that you can soak in water overnight and then plant.

Whenever I meet a woman who’s looking for a good sports bra, I’m now referring them to Laura Tempesta’s BRAVOLUTION site. (Isn’t that a cool logo? And a great tagline?) I had a great time talking with Laura, and she recommended two bras that might be the right fit for me (just like the perfect desk chair, I have yet to find the perfect sports bra). As the former sports bra design executive at Nike, with a Master’s degree in Lingerie Design, I trust Laura’s tips.

I love Liana Teresa‘s card! Liana has so much positive energy and hustle that it made me want to have a business or product that needed a logo just so I could hire her. If you need a designer for a product, business, or event, check out Liana’s site. She has a cool blog too.

Some other entrepreneurs I met were Maria Roberts at the first table I sat at who’s co-creator of the beautiful blog Spinach4Breakfast; productivity coach and blogger Julie Torres from the very long lunch line; pilates/yoga instructor and lifestyle coach Lani McGuire from the wonderful meditation session, and Emily Giegerich (and her colleague) who I sat next to at Arianna Huffington’s talk who created the great peer-to-peer resource site, IHadCancer. I love their tagline: Shared Experiences, Shared Strength.

Last but not least, I met Mara Landis, Founder and CEO of Nutmeg Aspirin, while were both in line for the bathroom. Mara’s site just launched and it’s a place to share, explore, and learn ways for “feeling, getting and being better.” If you have tips you’d like to share, check out her site.

And, speaking of bathrooms, here’s my one and only complaint about BlogHer18…

The conference needed A LOT more bathrooms! It took place at Tribeca 360, which was a good location, but there were very few bathroom stalls. They converted the men’s restroom to a women’s restroom, but it still wasn’t enough–only about 8 stalls total. When you have 500 women at a conference, you have to book a location with a lot more bathroom stalls. BlogHer team, you did many things right, but this one thing is imperative to every attendee’s health and comfort. Please step up your bathroom game with the next conference.

In the end, I really enjoyed my time at BlogHer18 and I’d definitely recommend BlogHer conferences to other women. I went to the conference alone, but came away feeling inspired, motivated, enlightened, and feeling less alone. It was definitely worth my time and money.

Peg Cheng is the author of The Contenders, a middle-grade novel that asks, can enemies become friends? She is currently writing another novel that is a re-imagining of the Snow White fairy tale set in 1980s Seattle. Peg is also the creator of Fear & Writing, a workshop for procrastinating writers from all walks of life.

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How I Stopped Being a Goals Junkie

Salvation by Natsuki Otani

I admit it. I’m a goals junkie.

For me, not setting goals is like not wanting to read. It’s the strangest, most unnatural thing for me. You see, I love setting goals–at the beginning of the year, throughout the year, at the end of the year, whenever. I love dreaming about the future.

For years, this tactic helped me. More than that, it helped me survive.

When I was going through hard times–which was more often than you think–planning for the future gave me hope. Having goals was like keeping my eyes focused on a shimmering pool of water that was in the distance across a parched, harsh desert. Sometimes the pool was a mirage, just like some of my goals, but sometimes it was a deeply rejuvenating well of fresh water, as were some of my goals when I reached them.

But last year, I didn’t set any goals due to all the sadness, pain, and anger happening in my life. I thought I’d just survive, get through the year, make it out alive.

It’s crazy when I think back on 2017. It was a horrible year on so many fronts–both personally and politically–and yet, I did more than I ever thought I would.

I read 48 books.

I finished the second and third drafts of my suspense novel, SEVEN DUDES.

I coached 11 clients, had an epiphany, and closed my writing coaching business at the end of October.

I taught five times–at a Writers Wellness Retreat in March, a Poetry Makerspace Workshop in May, a Fear & Writing Workshop in September, and at two Pacific Lutheran University Freshman Writing Seminars in November.

What helped me do all this?

I set daily habits instead of goals.

It was hard. It was not natural to me. But focusing on my daily life, rather than the future, was all I could do to get through this last year, and remarkably, it ended up helping me.

I became more mindful of my thoughts–both good ones and disturbing ones–and I became more aware of my emotions. I allowed myself to feel more of my feelings, and thus, felt more at peace. People always think it’s the opposite–as in, if I feel more, than I will feel less at peace. It might feel that way at first, but after you really feel your emotions, you can actually let them go, and then peace settles in.

Being mindful and feeling my emotions helped me to become a more healthy person, even though I did gain 12 pounds from eating my feels for the first seven months of the year. I knew I was doing it but I didn’t feel like stopping. Live and learn, girl, live and learn.

So, like last year, I’m not setting any goals for this year, but I am setting habits. Here are the DAILY HABITS I want to start, or keep doing, in 2018.

  1. Meditate for 10 minutes
  2. Create for 20 minutes
  3. Read for pleasure for 20 minutes
  4. Exercise for 20 minutes
  5. Sleep for 8 hours

These are all minimums. I can, of course, do more of these habits on a daily basis, and most days, I do. But, I wanted to set the minimum times for each habit so that even on the most crazy and hectic days, I can still feel good that I did the things that make me feel at my best.

2018 is here. Will it be a better year than 2017? I don’t know. But I do know this: I’m living my days the way I want to live my life. And that’s something.

Peg Cheng is the author of The Contenders, a middle-grade novel that asks, can enemies become friends? She is currently writing another novel that is a re-imagining of the Snow White fairy tale set in 1980s Seattle. Peg is also the creator of Fear & Writing, a workshop for procrastinating writers from all walks of life.

Art: Salvation by Natsuki Otani.